The Week in Cartoons, Annotated by Qatar

Kidding. I did it. Happily. Without an abject bribe.

Well, what a week in The Trump Surreality Shitshow.

Let’s get right to it, before I forget what I was going to say.

First, Smerconish:

Well, the bribery is all out in the open now, isn’t it? Qatar, those rascally little Hamas and 9-11 enablers, gave 8647 (come and get me, everyone knows it’s not anything: look at Facebook. Is the FBI calling them? No.) a 747-8 valued at $400 million.

Let’s look at this “gift”, though.

It’s a teardown.

It’s going to cost way more than $400 million to strip it down to the airframe, and it won’t be ready until 2029, presumably when this clown is out of office, but I rely on nothing at this point.

This is kind of like your dad giving you a 1970 Impala and then you’re on the hook for the new engine that will blow in eight months.

This is the kind of cartoon that starts off as nothing, really, and I just added on to it until it was filled up with Trumpcrap ©. Turned out pretty well. Remember when I was bitterly complaining about doing “simple” cartoons last week? Well, this week, there were lots and lots of illustration opportunities. Let’s check ‘em out.

Here is my first cartoon/illustration for the Chronicle and sent out to Tribune:

Sometimes, when I don’t want to drive myself absolutely insane thinking about how many cartoons I have to produce, I usually think of my illustration to go along with my Chronicle column on emoluments as just an illustration. Sometimes they turn into real cartoons, so I throw them out to the wolves the next day in national syndication. I am not allowed to do this for Smerconish, and sometimes I just double up on the same subject because it’s such a great topic. So I sent it out.

This came to me fairly quickly, and I always enjoy drawing airplane parts. And screws, nuts, wing nuts, rivets, and all the attendant detritus. I go into a little zen trance when I do these; I just draw another screw. How many screws does it take until it feels right? I didn’t do a count, but I’d say there are 50 or so screws and the like. Now let me do a rough count.

Over 60, at least.

You do it. I’m tired from drawing them.

Anyway, what do we have next? Another airplane cartoon? Woot!

I had no idea where I was going with this, and this happens all the time. I just start drawing to get something cooking.

I drew the sitting ATC controller first, and then added the rest of the crew. The right hand side of the drawing was blank. I looked at it for ten minutes, and then threw in the cockpit, and there it is. I didn’t even need to think of the caption first, because it doesn’t really matter. But this worked out just fine.

I had think about what kind of debris was on the floor, so I thought glass and ceiling tiles. Threw in an office chair for some black, and out some glass on the top of the fuselage. There you go. I also like drawing rebar, and don’t ask me why.

Note the broken window.

I really try to make sure my glass cracks are accurate. This reminds me that I forgot to add a detail on a cartoon I will show you in a moment.

Here’s another from Tuesday (I almost always have to double up on Tuesday, and I also wrote a column for the Chronicle that morning. My hand was a little stiff.

I have been lucky that I don’t have any significant pain issues from my work, and I know it’s pretty common at this age (64, yes, I am sorry, Boy Wonder is over).

I had been chewing on this subject for a few weeks, and hadn’t gotten around to it. People ask me how I take notes on my ideas, and it’s very simple: I just text myself a writing prompt, and I can remember the cartoon idea I had, generally.

This was another where I wasn’t quite sure where I was going with this, but I just kept adding until the frame was filled up.

I spent quite a long time fussing over this. These can get really bust really fast, but I was generally pleased with this. I actually put the tank in first, and then added Hogsbreath and Friends next. Then Trump and Melania, then the plane, then all the background stuff. It took about three hours or so. Maybe not even.

I think the jet is a little out of scale, but no one has called me on it. You’re welcome to, of course, as my clients. I’m not proud.

Well, this was kinda fun.

I also had been putting off doing a Big Beautiful Bill cartoon, so I guess was Sweeping Up Week. I started with the face, and worked backwards. I wanted it to be gender-neutral and not sexist, so I just threw everything together. Then I thought, hey, makes the arms tentacles and claws. Throw in some green liquid, a real crowd-pleaser. Call it good.

When drawing crowds, one has to make them detailed enough to be recognizable, but not so detailed that they overwhelm the central point. They’re not the joke. You all may also note that I will often just throw some blue tone over crowds to cover that it’s not over-illustrated. Over-illustrated is bad.

What else do we have here?

I noted that Gov. Gav was unusually dominant in the news this week. I mean, he’s usually in the news, but he was REALLY in the news.

People ask me if I personally like Gov. Newsom, and the answer is, yes, I do. I see his flaws, but generally he’s pretty effective and tries to do the right thing (except the trans kid thing, which I still find baffling). I get why he would have Steve Bannon on his pod and all that—he didn’t exactly finish him off in the interview. What we hear out in California is that his ex-wife, Ambassador (I think? Was she confirmed?) Kimberly Guilfoyle, has helped him get MAGA folks on. His most interesting one thus far was with Gov. Tim Walz. I really recommend that one.

Anyway, I love drawing Newsom. I heard that his former press guy, Anthony York, didn’t dig the length of his chin, so I shortened it up a bit. He was right.

Anyway, I think we have one more.

We do.

BART went dark this week for several hours, which, as you can imagine, was an absolute catastrophe. A lot of people had to drive in, which was naturally a mess.

You know what they’re getting for parking in San Francisco? I paid about $28 for four hours a few months ago. I have paid way more than that for overnight: $58. Horrific.

Anyway, this was another one where I had to look at BART stations, BART platforms, and BART trains, so it had be pretty close. Not exact, but close enough. I like drawing train stuff. Not obsessively (railroad nuts are called “foamers”, two railroad nuts tell me).

One of my best buddies is Ben Sargent, who is absolutely delightful and the former Pulitzer Prize-winning editorial cartoonist for the now-execrable Austin American-Statesman. He’s a train guy, and has a magnificent model railroad in his print shop (he also does offset printing, as a hobby, along with his brother). Ben also is a conductor on a rail line hobbyists run in Austin, somewhere.

And, good God, is Ben great at drawing trains (and everything else).

So I know Ben is watching my train illustration. It’s good know someone is supervising this production line.

I think that’s all I got, kids.

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Hey, You Betchas! : That’s it for the evening. As usual, thank you all for your support, and you’re given me stability in an unstable journalism environment. Welcome to the YB Community, the wonderful and entertaining Judy Green Schieble! I am now going to eat something, or the other. Had a pretty fair weekend, and got out to golf after several months. I did OK: 47. I fished Friday for a few hours, and caught three bluegills—Minnesota childhood flashbacks. Bobber and everything. So 1972. Have a great night!—J.